I’m in a slump.
I’m in a writing slump.
I’m in a creative writing slump.
I’m not particularly sure why, although I have my suspicions.
See, even writing that last sentence was difficult.
I used to write like crazy. I have always loved words, and they naturally flowed from my lips, my pen, or my fingers. When something momentous happened, my go-to would be my journal. Or my blog site.
What happened to me?
Like I said, I have my suspicions.
There are things going through my head right now. So many things to be done, and so many distractions. Often, these things weigh so heavily on my mind and heart, and the temptation to just ignore them and turn away and do something mindless is great. Often, I have succumbed to that temptation.
Or is it the fact that two years in seminary, writing all those gazillion papers, tired me out?
Possible. But I do have a bigger suspicion.
Two years ago, I met with a professional counselor. I’d been going through some really heavy stuff, I was one messed up girl, and I knew I needed help.
My sessions ran through half the year of 2015, and ended around the first quarter of 2016. The sessions helped immensely, and really allowed me to take a deeper, honest look at myself, and have a deeper appreciation of how God created me.
One thing my counselor and I worked on was acknowledging, and expressing, my emotions. She taught me some exercises and practices that allowed me to do so. I quickly realized that while these exercises and practices were very helpful, they were also very exhausting. Thinking, and processing my emotions, exhausted me, and sapped me of the energy to write.
But I finally realized recently that not writing was wounding my heart more. I was going against something I was meant to be doing.
I want out of this slump.
This blog post is one of my efforts in trying. Sigh.