The beauty of living in community is seeing that I am not alone, and that there are many others like me. As I journey through the present as a single person, this is exactly what I see!
I believe, with all my heart, in the rewards of journeying with community! Still, we are all unique individuals, and these differences can be sources of tension. I believe though, that community is worth fighting for.
If you’re a single person reading this, please take note that while this manifesto, in some points may be specific to my own community, I hope you will think of ways to journeying well in your own community. And I hope you find some comfort knowing that I, too, am part of your community, albeit virtually. 🙂
If you’re a married person reading this, I hope you gain some insight from this and find ways to journey lovingly with the singles in your life.
This is the second part of my Single’s Manifesto. Read Part 1 here!
ATTITUDE TO OTHER SINGLES
As a single person, I will seek and create opportunities to build healthy relationships with fellow singles in my community. My primary motive will be to foster sisterhood and brotherhood among us, knowing and understanding that first and foremost, we are all brothers and sisters in Christ.
While I am aware of the fact that some singles have paired up and found their spouses here in this community, or of the fact that some singles here are intent in looking for possible future lifetime partners (let me be clear: nothing wrong that!), I will not fall into the trap of constantly evaluating and relating with men based on what their potential relationship to me could be like. I will treat single men in the community with respect and accord them with honor, whether I find them attractive or not, or whether they find me attractive or not.
I will seek to be a sister to my fellow single women, offering encouragement, support, love, and counsel. I will take their hand (literally and figuratively) and find mutual encouragement in the fact that the Maker of the Universe is sufficient to provide for all our needs. I will share my longings and heart stirrings to my sisters, but I will not whine, nor complain, but set an example of speaking words of life and hope for the present and the future.
I will be a source of affirmation both for my brothers and my sisters. I will be a “dream-releaser,” someone who can motivate my brothers and sisters to pursue and discover the passions God has placed in their hearts. And while it is true that this period of singleness may be temporary for most of the singles, I will help my fellow singles (as I hope they will do the same for me) see this period of singleness as a gift to be cherished, more than just a transitory phase to the married phase.
I will remind us that while marrieds are blessed in ways singles are not, we singles are also blessed in ways married people are not. We must see and appreciate these blessings as unique and even better, in a way.
I also commit to protect myself and my fellow brothers and sisters from insensitive remarks and teasing that may damage relationships. I will do this by not encouraging prolonged teasing within the group, nor from other people, especially from marrieds, no matter how well-meaning they may be.
I will look to the single people in this community, especially those more advanced in age, as people of a special kind of wisdom, and therefore I will seek their fellowship and counsel. And I will honor them for the way they have faithfully obeyed God.